mom jokes, pt 2
Patrick: mwahaha, no, i just remember u tellin me that u liked teno rings
me: yea they are nice, but then i will always be "the girl who has [redacted]'s wife's ring". there has to be something better out there. something more ME.
Patrick: i would always go classic. classics are classics.
Patrick: girls wanna bling
me: http://whiteflashdiamonds.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/img_2391.jpg
me: like that?
Patrick: id get her another ring in addition to it thats more personal
me: awwwww more more more. more rings yay
Patrick: so is that what u told [redacted]?
me: that he should get her multiple rings?
Patrick: no no
me: i told him to go screw himself, i aint helpin
Dec 9th
fb hell, pt 2
Phe: that's right!
Patrick: yeah i dont kno him, so off w/ his head!!
Phe: hehehe martha and harry, you two are the bestest
Patrick: um.... i dont kno if u can call us that
Phe: hahahha aiyo!
me: HAHAHA why not!?!!!
Patrick: i dont kno, its our secret names... UNLESS she has one too
Patrick: and dont even think about giving her a name. THATS MY JOB
me: cult initiation time....
Patrick: i have the best names
me: work your magic, patrick. i have veto power if its not awesome enough right?
Patrick: BARBARA!
Dec 7th
badass cookie, pt 2
Patrick: no, ill be like, Here! throw u the cookie
me: hahahahah thats so badass
Patrick: and u'll be like "wahts this??" "its a cookie" as i pull out a cigarette and light it as i look out into the dark night into the distance
Patrick: and puff out smoke from the corner of my mouth. w/ cig still in mouth w/ my leather jacket, and my all black outfit i stand by the side of the building and put one leg up against the building, hand in pocket
Patrick: u open up the wrapping and look at the half eaten cookie w/ big eyes
me: ummmm
Patrick: OHHH CHOCOLATE WALNUT!!! MY FAV, THANKS PAT!!
Patrick: "yeah, whatever" another puff of smoke
Dec 4th
geriatric, pt 2
me: the girl was in love with him at first but then figures it was probably just lust and infatuation, so then she rejects him, marries someone else
me: meanwhile, he vows to remain faithful to her... by screwing every other woman in sight
Phe: HAHA
Patrick: well hes gotta practice for the big day
me: it must only make sense to guys
Phe: men have such weird logic
Patrick: practice
Patrick: u dont want a guy that doesnt know what hes doin
me: eventually her husband dies
me: this guy TRACKS her down, still professes his love for her. they are like, a million years old now and they finally run away together
Dec 4th